Saturday, August 30, 2025

Do not tell the man who is carrying you that he stinks

The Sierra Leonean proverb "Do not tell the man who is carrying you that he stinks" emphasizes the importance of tact and discretion in relationships and financial matters. It suggests that when someone is providing support or assistance, particularly in a vulnerable situation, it is crucial to approach criticism or negative feedback with sensitivity. 

This proverb can be particularly applicable in financial contexts, where constructive feedback is essential for growth and stability. Rather than bluntly pointing out someone's shortcomings, it is better to foster a respectful dialogue that acknowledges their contributions while also addressing areas for improvement.

Take the example of Chidimma, a young entrepreneur who recently started her own small business. Initially, she relied heavily on a close family friend who lent her money to help her cover start-up costs. While Chidimma appreciated the support, she noticed that her friend's management style was somewhat lacking, leading to disorganized finances. Applying the wisdom of the proverb, Chidimma chose to address her concerns delicately. 

Instead of directly confronting her friend about their poor financial practices, she focused on sharing her vision for the business and highlighting the positive aspects of their partnership. By framing her feedback in a supportive manner, Chidimma was able to encourage her friend to adopt better money management strategies without creating tension or hurt feelings.

From this proverb, we learn the importance of communication and the way we convey our thoughts. In the realm of managing money, this approach teaches us to be mindful of how we express our concerns or criticisms, especially to those who are offering help. Instead of damaging relationships through harsh words, we should strive for a balance that fosters improvement while nurturing the bond we share with others. 

Ultimately, the lesson is that kindness and respect can go a long way in both personal and financial relationships, encouraging growth and understanding while minimizing conflict.


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